If I had a Koala bear, I'd name it Grizzly.
I'd pierce its ears and paint its toenails and put it in Koala beauty contests.
Grizzly would love it.
He would get to spend time with me, and dance, and wear cute outfits.
I wish my mom would have done that much for me.
I wanted to be a pageant princess.
But nooo. She always said, "you can't have a frilly dress, tap shoes, or fake teeth, Richard. Plus, you know boys can't win beauty contests!"
Mother. I did the right thing putting rat poison in her oatmeal.
Now I am older and stronger. I look in the mirror proud of myself.
"A boy can wear a dress and be pretty and win a crown," I said as I spun around in my mother's wedding dress in front of the big mirror. "I look pretty as a pageant princess."
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